Starting about June of 2013 I Started getting random phone calls from companies looking for a guy named “Peter”. The first call that started this was a warranty company who was asking if I wanted to extend the warranty on his Ferrari. It happened on and off, and then completely stopped for a while. Just before the Christmas break they started up again. I got phone calls from his bank, from a Doctor’s office, and from his Parole officer. His Missed his Parole meeting last week his officer was pissed. 

So a few minutes ago my phone rang, and it was some guy from a company trying to sell updated siding and windows for older homes. I informed him that I wasn’t peter and that he has the wrong number, added that Peter has been giving out my number for some time now. The telemarketer was kind of stunned, and he went silent on the phone. At this point I decided to kind of roll with it. I added that peter missed a call from his Parole officer because he apparently missed his parole meeting, and his officer wasn’t happy. This seemed to push the guy and he went back to his script and asked if I had a house, I told him yes but it’s a new build and I don’t need new windows. He ignored my statement went back to his script and I said “No, no, it’s fine… I don’t…” He kept on Ignoring me continued his script. I got to admit, I rather admired the guy for his tenacity at this point given what I’ve thrown at him. So I said “Hey look, I’m at work, so this isn’t the time. I’m going to let you go, but do me a favor. If you ever get a hold of this peter guy, tell him that his Wife’s OB-GYN called and her pregnancy test came back positive. If he’s on the lamb he needs to know that he has a baby on the way.” The telemarketer clearly in shock stammered on the phone, he was making noises but not so much words, like he kept starting a word but was unable to finish beyond the first letter. After a few seconds of this he managed to get out quickly “Have a good day sir” and hung up.

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